








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 383 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 333 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




138 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5241 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,560 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1563 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2292 | 41% |
| HE Grenades | 1327 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 378 | 7% |
Our logs show you have wasted $923,924 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 806 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MNK | Unga Bunga | 62% | 42 |
| #2 | Crazy Mike | 58% | 72 |
| #3 | Nitch_zzZZ | 49% | 35 |
| #4 | Gold Digger | 42% | 105 |
| #5 | CeeWu | 41% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gold Digger | 51 | 0.0233 |
| #2 | CeeWu | 15 | 0.0165 |
| #3 | MNK | Unga Bunga | 12 | 0.0131 |
| #4 | BEE | 5 | 0.0072 |
| #5 | Nitch_zzZZ | 3 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gold Digger | 214 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #2 | Crazy Mike | 143 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | CeeWu | 137 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | Nitch_zzZZ | 99 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | BEE | 76 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Antonov Pashel | +2.04 | 51 | 36 |
| #2 | MNK | Unga Bunga | +0.76 | 61 | 46 |
| #3 | Crazy Mike | +0.74 | 58 | 54 |
| #4 | Gold Digger | -0.10 | 56 | 44 |
| #5 | BEE | -0.23 | 57 | 30 |





