








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 354 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 97 matches | ||
| Premier | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1435 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,780 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1245 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1246 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1329 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 960 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $839,191 of utility $186 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 89 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #22 | MightyHunter | 44% | 16 |
| #23 | 𝕌ℕ𝕂ℕ𝕆𝕎ℕ | 43% | 14 |
| #24 | 한국수달보호협회 | 42% | 19 |
| #25 | 한발에주님곁으로 | 34% | 29 |
| #26 | EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE | 33% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SKY | 93 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #2 | EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE | 91 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #3 | Ex1 | 85 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | natsu | 80 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | Rivn | 71 | 0.16 | 1 min |





