








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1228 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 264 matches | ||
| Premier | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 101 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




79 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6319 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,900 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4851 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2116 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 5075 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 4858 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,741,718 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2360 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Howard Jones | 1009 | 0.15 | 29 min |
| #2 | -z1k4?~! | 429 | 0.07 | 12 min |
| #3 | McToffy | 386 | 0.25 | 10 min |
| #4 | sy | 339 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #5 | kingmika | 336 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dx | +1.75 | 69 | 51 |
| #2 | Howard Jones | +1.55 | 68 | 69 |
| #3 | NeuroToxinCS | +1.51 | 58 | 66 |
| #4 | sy | +0.89 | 55 | 62 |
| #5 | McToffy | +0.83 | 49 | 71 |





