








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 14 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1060 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,674 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 718 | 20% |
| Smokes | 718 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1314 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 924 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $398,315 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 26 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BriarGates | 51% | 90 |
| #2 | Project | 50% | 88 |
| #3 | Register Garry | 48% | 21 |
| #4 | Z2TM | 48% | 40 |
| #5 | Fobeeyo | 45% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Register Garry | 48% | 21 |
| #4 | Z2TM | 48% | 40 |
| #5 | Fobeeyo | 45% | 11 |
| #6 | Timbloxrox | 44% | 9 |
| #7 | Pervitin | 39% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Project | 12 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | BriarGates | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | Pervitin | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Z2TM | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Register Garry | 2 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Project | 229 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #2 | Z2TM | 114 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #3 | Pervitin | 59 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | BriarGates | 29 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | Register Garry | 27 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Z2TM | +3.13 | 78 | 62 |
| #2 | Project | +2.21 | 41 | 69 |
| #3 | BriarGates | +0.16 | 25 | 42 |
| #4 | Crab | -1.21 | 37 | 54 |
| #5 | Pervitin | -1.45 | 19 | 38 |





