








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 32 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
437 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,360 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 386 | 28% |
| Smokes | 494 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 200 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 280 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $101,359 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Howlin | 2 | 0.0118 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | May | +6.04 | 82 | 67 |
| #2 | Fireee | +3.88 | 89 | 64 |
| #3 | G3 DangaleQuingle | +3.03 | 77 | 53 |
| #4 | Howlin | +2.94 | 76 | 50 |
| #5 | 190KG BENCH | +2.06 | 66 | 66 |





