








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1740 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 767 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




270 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12638 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,509 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7733 | 25% |
| Smokes | 8272 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 8530 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 6974 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,957,120 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 399 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Minatozaki Sana DROP.SKIN | 45% | 251 |
| #5 | dominic decoco | 45% | 476 |
| #6 | SOEKARNO SKROEP | 45% | 211 |
| #7 | yohi. | 42% | 466 |
| #8 | bmw enjoyer | 41% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dominic decoco | 185 | 0.0182 |
| #2 | SOEKARNO SKROEP | 100 | 0.0227 |
| #3 | yohi. | 70 | 0.0070 |
| #4 | Schwarz | 28 | 0.0136 |
| #5 | GEE-L | 14 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yohi. | 1086 | 0.11 | 22 min |
| #2 | Minatozaki Sana DROP.SKIN | 823 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #3 | SOEKARNO SKROEP | 307 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | dominic decoco | 270 | 0.03 | 5 min |
| #5 | GEE-L | 263 | 0.06 | 5 min |





