








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1174 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 100 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 62 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5920 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,459 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6278 | 29% |
| Smokes | 6420 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4429 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4332 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $709,619 of utility $67 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 589 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .pain | 32 | 0.0062 |
| #2 | goldie | 20 | 0.0113 |
| #3 | dy'by(^_^)V | 17 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | yamubi | 15 | 0.0039 |
| #5 | EDUARD | 12 | 0.0020 |





