








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 190 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
825 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,048 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 521 | 25% |
| Smokes | 516 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 513 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 498 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $247,080 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Leonisse | 75% | 16 |
| #2 | ❟❛❟ Mags ︻デ 一 | 69% | 29 |
| #3 | M0S_ | 67% | 6 |
| #4 | oFlaqme | 67% | 9 |
| #5 | PetersenGG | 63% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Grandyy07 | 62% | 13 |
| #8 | MoleNWOW #KKK | 55% | 20 |
| #9 | oPt1mum | 33% | 6 |
| #10 | koppeN ✝ | 0% | 4 |
| #11 | MR.Bunny | 0% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ❟❛❟ Mags ︻デ 一 | 5 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | PetersenGG | 3 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | MoleNWOW #KKK | 2 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | Leonisse | 1 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Habe- | 1 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ❟❛❟ Mags ︻デ 一 | 85 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #2 | MoleNWOW #KKK | 50 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | PetersenGG | 48 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Habe- | 46 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #5 | Leonisse | 40 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M0S_ | +2.27 | 55 | 53 |
| #2 | MasHH | +2.22 | 90 | 63 |
| #3 | oFlaqme | +1.37 | 79 | 61 |
| #4 | koppeN ✝ | +1.14 | 51 | 72 |
| #5 | Leonisse | +1.03 | 82 | 53 |





