








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 103 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
577 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,330 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 388 | 29% |
| Smokes | 196 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 477 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 269 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $312,299 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | opCorvega | 54% | 13 |
| #2 | Knockables | 47% | 17 |
| #3 | camo | 29% | 7 |
| #4 | frobby | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | opCorvega | 54% | 13 |
| #2 | Knockables | 47% | 17 |
| #3 | camo | 29% | 7 |
| #4 | frobby | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | opCorvega | 2 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | Knockables | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Knockables | 111 | 0.32 | 3 min |
| #2 | opCorvega | 29 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #3 | camo | 18 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| #4 | frobby | 4 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Knockables | +6.90 | 86 | 66 |
| #2 | camo | -0.48 | 37 | 43 |
| #3 | opCorvega | -0.97 | 67 | 27 |
| #4 | A-10 GO BRRT BRRT | -1.04 | 68 | 46 |
| #5 | frobby | -6.12 | 53 | 16 |





