








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
249 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 524 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 140 | 27% |
| Smokes | 160 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 131 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 93 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $86,705 of utility $203 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 20 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jorg | 57% | 14 |
| #2 | Gucci Bucket Hat | 43% | 7 |
| #3 | Anonymous | 0% | 2 |
| #4 | Bibo | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jorg | 57% | 14 |
| #2 | Gucci Bucket Hat | 43% | 7 |
| #3 | Anonymous | 0% | 2 |
| #4 | Bibo | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jorg | 2 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | Gucci Bucket Hat | 1 | 0.0069 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jorg | 25 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #2 | Anonymous | 9 | 0.23 | 0 min |
| #3 | Bibo | 5 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alfa Romeo | +2.35 | 84 | 55 |
| #2 | Anonymous | +0.57 | 72 | 56 |
| #3 | Jorg | -1.93 | 59 | 51 |
| #4 | Gucci Bucket Hat | -4.29 | 19 | 20 |
| #5 | Bibo | -5.00 | 39 | 55 |





