








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 271 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




114 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2552 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,865 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1379 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1884 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1225 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1377 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $726,398 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 469 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JUJMS | 298 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #2 | blectran | 72 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | Hager | 49 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Kalis | 49 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | LucasNagy | 36 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr. Bluescreen™ ◢◤ | +2.47 | 74 | 48 |
| #2 | ReeZey | +2.45 | 28 | 46 |
| #3 | seves | +2.30 | 56 | 19 |
| #4 | Hager | +2.06 | 45 | 43 |
| #5 | Forsberg | +1.78 | 71 | 44 |





