








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 19 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1107 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,462 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 723 | 29% |
| Smokes | 844 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 395 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 500 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $175,049 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hyu | 88% | 8 |
| #2 | Shinji | 81% | 16 |
| #3 | Senpaii | 80% | 5 |
| #4 | Toji ⚡ | 77% | 22 |
| #5 | luck257 | 72% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | raymer | 70% | 10 |
| #10 | shlepp | 70% | 10 |
| #11 | CJK | 70% | 10 |
| #12 | kazmi | 63% | 8 |
| #13 | bao^g | 60% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toji ⚡ | 4 | 0.0082 |
| #2 | luck257 | 3 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | shlepp | 1 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | kazmi | 1 | 0.0052 |
| #5 | fisher-1- | 1 | 0.0077 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shinji | 155 | 0.41 | 3 min |
| #2 | luck257 | 79 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #3 | Toji ⚡ | 68 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | CJK | 57 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #5 | hyu | 42 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xete | +3.34 | 90 | 51 |
| #2 | Senpaii | +2.46 | 73 | 75 |
| #3 | fisher-1- | +2.11 | 83 | 72 |
| #4 | Toji ⚡ | +1.87 | 79 | 65 |
| #5 | hyu | +1.82 | 55 | 64 |





