








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 233 matches | ||
| Premier | 169 matches | ||
| Faceit | 95 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




70 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6105 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,551 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2940 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3970 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3117 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3524 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,147,053 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 241 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | 𓀀𓀁𓀀𓀁𓀀𓀁𓀀𓀁 | 54% | 79 |
| #5 | nun1nsk1 | 53% | 53 |
| #6 | piz | 51% | 59 |
| #7 | MartiNi)))) | 51% | 140 |
| #8 | coelho | 43% | 156 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | coelho | 21 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | MartiNi)))) | 6 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | nun1nsk1 | 6 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | 𓀀𓀁𓀀𓀁𓀀𓀁𓀀𓀁 | 5 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | piz | 3 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | coelho | 601 | 0.18 | 15 min |
| #2 | MartiNi)))) | 514 | 0.18 | 14 min |
| #3 | 𓀀𓀁𓀀𓀁𓀀𓀁𓀀𓀁 | 255 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #4 | erk | 212 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #5 | piz | 147 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | serg | +4.02 | 88 | 50 |
| #2 | piz | +1.80 | 83 | 64 |
| #3 | nun1nsk1 | +0.18 | 57 | 54 |
| #4 | erk | -0.07 | 66 | 67 |
| #5 | 𓀀𓀁𓀀𓀁𓀀𓀁𓀀𓀁 | -0.09 | 70 | 65 |





