








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 987 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 290 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 229 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 82 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 51 matches | ||
| Faceit | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 71 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6782 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 46,412 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 16004 | 34% |
| Smokes | 11411 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 14477 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 4520 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,236,094 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1151 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Schwartz | 49% | 96 |
| #2 | MitarCZE | 47% | 98 |
| #3 | Leonardo | 47% | 64 |
| #4 | _AMINAAA_ | 47% | 124 |
| #5 | wOndEr | 44% | 50 |





