








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 229 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
453 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 115 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 59 | 51% |
| Smokes | 38 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 8 | 7% |
| Molotovs | 10 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $74,128 of utility $42 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1065 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tacoz | 29% | 24 |
| #2 | Marigold | 26% | 68 |
| #3 | voxxel | 25% | 8 |
| #4 | rubver16 | 25% | 61 |
| #5 | dragontonic | 0% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tacoz | 29% | 24 |
| #2 | Marigold | 26% | 68 |
| #3 | voxxel | 25% | 8 |
| #4 | rubver16 | 25% | 61 |
| #5 | dragontonic | 0% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Marigold | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | rubver16 | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | tacoz | 4 | 0.0091 |
| #4 | voxxel | 4 | 0.0247 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rubver16 | 117 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #2 | Marigold | 104 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | tacoz | 31 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | voxxel | 20 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | voxxel | +7.05 | 77 | 34 |
| #2 | tacoz | +0.66 | 55 | 24 |
| #3 | rubver16 | +0.43 | 34 | 41 |
| #4 | not mario | -3.66 | 8 | 5 |
| #5 | Marigold | -4.85 | 10 | 31 |





