








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 279 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 112 matches | ||
| Wingman | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1274 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,872 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 578 | 15% |
| Smokes | 957 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1383 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 954 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $691,638 of utility $206 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 243 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oh no! | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | kanch0- | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | c ya next week | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | fa1conet | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Political Sadness | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oh no! | 308 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #2 | c ya next week | 203 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| #3 | kanch0- | 113 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | fa1conet | 109 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #5 | ItzRickRiz | 71 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oh no! | +1.17 | 75 | 59 |
| #2 | c ya next week | +0.82 | 56 | 64 |
| #3 | ItzRickRiz | +0.81 | 74 | 64 |
| #4 | Political Sadness | +0.14 | 57 | 42 |
| #5 | kanch0- | +0.01 | 69 | 55 |





