








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 257 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 226 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2154 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,988 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2847 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2879 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2641 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2621 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $336,712 of utility $55 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 412 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BloodBat | 60% | 43 |
| #2 | Doc Potterywood | 48% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BloodBat | 60% | 43 |
| #2 | Doc Potterywood | 48% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Doc Potterywood | 11 | 0.0057 |
| #2 | BloodBat | 3 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Doc Potterywood | 526 | 0.27 | 14 min |
| #2 | BloodBat | 46 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BloodBat | +1.65 | 41 | 61 |
| #2 | Doc Potterywood | +0.54 | 59 | 73 |
| #3 | JolleJoh | -1.15 | 55 | 60 |





