








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 743 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 256 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3822 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,950 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2034 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3006 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2702 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2208 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,264,887 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 81 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thaitanium | 71% | 42 |
| #2 | Pineapple | 63% | 138 |
| #3 | Cat | 62% | 29 |
| #4 | wenimecha indasuma | 62% | 39 |
| #5 | ThaUnreal | 59% | 167 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | wenimecha indasuma | 62% | 39 |
| #5 | ThaUnreal | 59% | 167 |
| #6 | ᵍᵒᵈnnaiim ♠ | 56% | 36 |
| #7 | Lovey♡ | 54% | 39 |
| #8 | 1vanaaa | 52% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pineapple | 10 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | ThaUnreal | 6 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Cat | 4 | 0.0068 |
| #4 | 1vanaaa | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | Thaitanium | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ThaUnreal | 354 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #2 | Pineapple | 335 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #3 | ᵍᵒᵈnnaiim ♠ | 121 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | 1vanaaa | 109 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | wenimecha indasuma | 100 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Four | +1.72 | 83 | 62 |
| #2 | Pineapple | +1.35 | 81 | 55 |
| #3 | Cat | +1.31 | 78 | 53 |
| #4 | Thaitanium | +0.98 | 69 | 49 |
| #5 | ThaUnreal | +0.91 | 82 | 54 |





