










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1835 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 891 matches | ||
| Faceit | 100 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 164 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




73 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10325 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 77,411 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 35081 | 45% |
| Smokes | 17013 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 11737 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 13580 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,364,673 of utility $53 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1337 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Латинский | 56% | 66 |
| #2 | Kääpeli Vörmy | 48% | 124 |
| #3 | Olvi3 | 48% | 82 |
| #4 | Mamba_mub | 44% | 87 |
| #5 | Runkku | 43% | 177 |





