








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 250 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 128 matches | ||
| Faceit | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 52 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2160 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,215 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1206 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1509 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1591 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1909 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $905,689 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 54 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prC 激發 | 67% | 24 |
| #2 | Mett\\tmo | 65% | 34 |
| #3 | prC | 61% | 102 |
| #4 | Boost | 60% | 142 |
| #5 | miese Zeiten | 59% | 174 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | miese Zeiten | 966 | 0.26 | 27 min |
| #2 | prC | 227 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | Boost | 226 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #4 | prC 精密 | 78 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | dNuts2k | 76 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | miese Zeiten | +3.98 | 90 | 72 |
| #2 | Mett\\tmo | +1.85 | 74 | 65 |
| #3 | prC 激發 | +0.99 | 76 | 67 |
| #4 | prC | +0.45 | 64 | 70 |
| #5 | prC | +0.10 | 71 | 67 |





