








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 49 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1029 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,382 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 316 | 13% |
| Smokes | 481 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 917 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 668 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $234,610 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 52 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Diablero | 59% | 41 |
| #2 | ♥ Aspectlove ♥ | 45% | 67 |
| #3 | Sam Elna | 44% | 141 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Diablero | 59% | 41 |
| #2 | ♥ Aspectlove ♥ | 45% | 67 |
| #3 | Sam Elna | 44% | 141 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sam Elna | 7 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | ♥ Aspectlove ♥ | 4 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Diablero | 3 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sam Elna | 992 | 0.35 | 22 min |
| #2 | Diablero | 166 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #3 | ♥ Aspectlove ♥ | 58 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sam Elna | +2.54 | 55 | 64 |
| #2 | Diablero | +2.28 | 74 | 57 |
| #3 | Na`Vi chunky munky | -2.78 | 40 | 34 |
| #4 | ♥ Aspectlove ♥ | -4.07 | 10 | 31 |





