








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 16 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
326 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 298 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 111 | 37% |
| Smokes | 10 | 3% |
| HE Grenades | 115 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 62 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $68,317 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GRoualal sgdtfghnjshdrwfjhrsdeqf | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | Hécatsu | 42% | 31 |
| #3 | Nico nico nii | 41% | 34 |
| #4 | Dess | 38% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GRoualal sgdtfghnjshdrwfjhrsdeqf | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | Hécatsu | 42% | 31 |
| #3 | Nico nico nii | 41% | 34 |
| #4 | Dess | 38% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hécatsu | 5 | 0.0093 |
| #2 | Dess | 1 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | GRoualal sgdtfghnjshdrwfjhrsdeqf | 1 | 0.0071 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GRoualal sgdtfghnjshdrwfjhrsdeqf | 28 | 0.20 | 0 min |
| #2 | Nico nico nii | 13 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #3 | Dess | 11 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GRoualal sgdtfghnjshdrwfjhrsdeqf | +3.86 | 65 | 45 |
| #2 | Mozgovish | +2.23 | 31 | 34 |
| #3 | Nico nico nii | +0.83 | 30 | 42 |
| #4 | Hécatsu | -0.16 | 51 | 18 |
| #5 | Dess | -3.01 | 19 | 24 |





