








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 383 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 543 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




43 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4176 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,715 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5938 | 24% |
| Smokes | 5299 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 6778 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 6700 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,508,606 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2330 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Belle Delphine | 61% | 44 |
| #2 | H O M E S T Y L E | 55% | 86 |
| #3 | ☯𝕵aϻ͢͢͢al巛 | 54% | 56 |
| #4 | Vicky Pedia | 43% | 60 |
| #5 | ✪ Fury' .oK?! | 34% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Belle Delphine | 61% | 44 |
| #2 | H O M E S T Y L E | 55% | 86 |
| #3 | ☯𝕵aϻ͢͢͢al巛 | 54% | 56 |
| #4 | Vicky Pedia | 43% | 60 |
| #5 | ✪ Fury' .oK?! | 34% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | H O M E S T Y L E | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | Vicky Pedia | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | ☯𝕵aϻ͢͢͢al巛 | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | ✪ Fury' .oK?! | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | H O M E S T Y L E | 230 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #2 | Vicky Pedia | 132 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | ✪ Belle Delphine | 83 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | ✪ Fury' .oK?! | 73 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | ☯𝕵aϻ͢͢͢al巛 | 39 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Belle Delphine | +4.45 | 83 | 63 |
| #2 | ✪ Fury' .oK?! | +4.20 | 81 | 65 |
| #3 | H O M E S T Y L E | +0.67 | 49 | 51 |
| #4 | ☯𝕵aϻ͢͢͢al巛 | -0.39 | 31 | 55 |
| #5 | Ginger | -1.53 | 33 | 54 |





