








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 279 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 111 matches | ||
| Faceit | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2018 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,761 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1761 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1746 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2009 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1245 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $806,290 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 107 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chef | 285 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | måler | 193 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #3 | Prison Mike | 142 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | OGTITZ | 46 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | chris | 31 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Can Dursun | +1.55 | 61 | 57 |
| #2 | Chef | +1.43 | 76 | 55 |
| #3 | chris | +1.20 | 94 | 68 |
| #4 | OGTITZ | +0.92 | 82 | 40 |
| #5 | måler | +0.74 | 64 | 61 |





