








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 46 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
808 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,655 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 212 | 13% |
| Smokes | 288 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 694 | 42% |
| Molotovs | 461 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $231,083 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MedikerN | 57% | 28 |
| #2 | Тɑсиний | 52% | 31 |
| #3 | 𝕄𝕚𝕟𝕚𝕤𝕖𝕘𝕒 | 46% | 13 |
| #4 | Aseregatki Repeat.gg | 45% | 11 |
| #5 | Lades181 | 33% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MedikerN | 57% | 28 |
| #2 | Тɑсиний | 52% | 31 |
| #3 | 𝕄𝕚𝕟𝕚𝕤𝕖𝕘𝕒 | 46% | 13 |
| #4 | Aseregatki Repeat.gg | 45% | 11 |
| #5 | Lades181 | 33% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MedikerN | 5 | 0.0115 |
| #2 | Тɑсиний | 2 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | Aseregatki Repeat.gg | 1 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Тɑсиний | 97 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #2 | Lades181 | 43 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | MedikerN | 26 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #4 | Aseregatki Repeat.gg | 5 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | 𝕄𝕚𝕟𝕚𝕤𝕖𝕘𝕒 | 3 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Тɑсиний | +2.22 | 75 | 58 |
| #2 | Zexxi | +1.54 | 78 | 49 |
| #3 | MedikerN | +1.39 | 77 | 50 |
| #4 | Aseregatki Repeat.gg | -3.10 | 38 | 37 |
| #5 | 𝕄𝕚𝕟𝕚𝕤𝕖𝕘𝕒 | -4.00 | 67 | 33 |





