








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1058 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 427 matches | ||
| Wingman | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7300 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,397 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10760 | 37% |
| Smokes | 6444 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 6975 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5218 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,431,975 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1639 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HP5+ | 60% | 125 |
| #2 | Sussy | 56% | 54 |
| #3 | Munk17 | 53% | 145 |
| #4 | Abu Musab al-Zarqawi | 51% | 75 |
| #5 | azro | 47% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HP5+ | 60% | 125 |
| #2 | Sussy | 56% | 54 |
| #3 | Munk17 | 53% | 145 |
| #4 | Abu Musab al-Zarqawi | 51% | 75 |
| #5 | azro | 47% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Munk17 | 16 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | azro | 9 | 0.0068 |
| #3 | HP5+ | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Abu Musab al-Zarqawi | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Sussy | 4 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HP5+ | 454 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| #2 | Munk17 | 284 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | azro | 120 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | Sussy | 76 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | Abu Musab al-Zarqawi | 43 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HP5+ | +3.37 | 75 | 74 |
| #2 | Munk17 | +2.55 | 75 | 48 |
| #3 | Sussy | +2.18 | 60 | 42 |
| #4 | Grimby Timbulten | +1.16 | 65 | 61 |
| #5 | azro | -2.59 | 47 | 53 |





