








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 788 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 420 matches | ||
| Faceit | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5491 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,636 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3148 | 19% |
| Smokes | 5586 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 3557 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4345 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,284,139 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1235 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | splurg | 64% | 56 |
| #2 | Blue. | 53% | 274 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | splurg | 64% | 56 |
| #2 | Blue. | 53% | 274 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blue. | 30 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | splurg | 12 | 0.0131 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blue. | 616 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #2 | splurg | 126 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | splurg | +5.62 | 88 | 50 |
| #2 | Blue. | +2.79 | 88 | 57 |
| #3 | MickTheMagician | +0.07 | 72 | 51 |





