








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 262 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
594 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,947 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 992 | 34% |
| Smokes | 693 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 836 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 426 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $158,287 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 112 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Cardinal | 52% | 79 |
| #6 | KrylliKs | 50% | 8 |
| #7 | GammaS | 48% | 27 |
| #8 | Doddlert | 25% | 20 |
| #9 | GOATMOO | 20% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cardinal | 20 | 0.0132 |
| #2 | GammaS | 3 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | yofaus | 3 | 0.0139 |
| #4 | Fox | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Doddlert | 1 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cardinal | +4.74 | 82 | 59 |
| #2 | GOATMOO | +1.63 | 89 | 57 |
| #3 | yofaus | +1.35 | 69 | 60 |
| #4 | KrylliKs | -0.72 | 45 | 60 |
| #5 | Fox | -2.04 | 49 | 46 |





