








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 679 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 691 matches | ||
| Wingman | 25 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




70 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9835 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,663 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6234 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2531 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 7937 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 5961 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,230,764 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1838 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Purple666 | 57% | 134 |
| #2 | Astro | 54% | 226 |
| #3 | Domenico Fallucci | 54% | 104 |
| #4 | rasb0b | 53% | 236 |
| #5 | Becca | 53% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Markow | 93 | 0.0079 |
| #2 | Astro | 28 | 0.0062 |
| #3 | rasb0b | 22 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | Becca | 11 | 0.0095 |
| #5 | Purple666 | 8 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Markow | 809 | 0.07 | 18 min |
| #2 | Astro | 514 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #3 | rasb0b | 499 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #4 | Purple666 | 259 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #5 | Domenico Fallucci | 131 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rasb0b | +2.24 | 85 | 64 |
| #2 | ESOTERIC HUGE GOD | +1.12 | 85 | 60 |
| #3 | Astro | +0.67 | 77 | 56 |
| #4 | Purple666 | +0.37 | 81 | 52 |
| #5 | Becca | +0.14 | 69 | 58 |





