








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 470 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 264 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4858 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,369 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2770 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1986 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2726 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1887 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,196,133 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 114 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DR PEPPER | 54% | 81 |
| #2 | W1NG | 52% | 33 |
| #3 | ⭕⃤Jörmungandr | 51% | 35 |
| #4 | Dom | 51% | 100 |
| #5 | willyflynn | 51% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dom | 313 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #2 | willyflynn | 214 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #3 | ⭕⃤Jörmungandr | 144 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #4 | TATO | 122 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | DR PEPPER | 69 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mono | +3.54 | 79 | 58 |
| #2 | willyflynn | +2.62 | 85 | 67 |
| #3 | ⭕⃤Jörmungandr | +0.78 | 66 | 76 |
| #4 | TATO | -0.38 | 73 | 46 |
| #5 | Dom | -0.44 | 69 | 57 |





