








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 754 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 265 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4485 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,816 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1057 | 14% |
| Smokes | 1757 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3050 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 1952 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,270,225 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 232 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ajkula | 50% | 80 |
| #2 | ✪ 𝖒𝖎𝖓𝖔𝖑𝖎𝖓𝖆 | 48% | 208 |
| #3 | Westify | 40% | 20 |
| #4 | kovja | 22% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ajkula | 50% | 80 |
| #2 | ✪ 𝖒𝖎𝖓𝖔𝖑𝖎𝖓𝖆 | 48% | 208 |
| #3 | Westify | 40% | 20 |
| #4 | kovja | 22% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ajkula | 9 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | ✪ 𝖒𝖎𝖓𝖔𝖑𝖎𝖓𝖆 | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | Westify | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ 𝖒𝖎𝖓𝖔𝖑𝖎𝖓𝖆 | 399 | 0.09 | 11 min |
| #2 | ajkula | 173 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | Westify | 32 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | kovja | 18 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hope | +3.00 | 89 | 50 |
| #2 | ajkula | +1.33 | 79 | 62 |
| #3 | Westify | -1.58 | 70 | 53 |
| #4 | ✪ 𝖒𝖎𝖓𝖔𝖑𝖎𝖓𝖆 | -3.68 | 50 | 59 |
| #5 | kovja | -6.31 | 19 | 32 |





