








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 461 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 252 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2267 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,310 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2550 | 23% |
| Smokes | 3511 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2405 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2844 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,195,075 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 283 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 300 кг | Kromberger | 58% | 31 |
| #2 | 300 кг | Eine Schnattern? | 56% | 27 |
| #3 | MemeMaster25 | 55% | 38 |
| #4 | FRUCHTPanda | 53% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 300 кг | Kromberger | 58% | 31 |
| #2 | 300 кг | Eine Schnattern? | 56% | 27 |
| #3 | MemeMaster25 | 55% | 38 |
| #4 | FRUCHTPanda | 53% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MemeMaster25 | 13 | 0.0165 |
| #2 | 300 кг | Eine Schnattern? | 6 | 0.0104 |
| #3 | 300 кг | Kromberger | 2 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | FRUCHTPanda | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 300 кг | Kromberger | 293 | 0.47 | 6 min |
| #2 | MemeMaster25 | 190 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #3 | 300 кг | Eine Schnattern? | 51 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | FRUCHTPanda | 21 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 300 кг | Eine Schnattern? | +6.34 | 74 | 53 |
| #2 | MemeMaster25 | +4.17 | 83 | 50 |
| #3 | 300 кг | Kromberger | -0.27 | 59 | 64 |
| #4 | BlackTafel | -0.38 | 63 | 65 |
| #5 | FRUCHTPanda | -2.03 | 39 | 67 |





