








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1002 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 475 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5449 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,279 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7485 | 35% |
| Smokes | 5388 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5138 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3268 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,409,204 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 80 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BergmannNo23 | 50% | 432 |
| #2 | Joe The Guide ツ | 50% | 52 |
| #3 | BigPerk | 50% | 177 |
| #4 | krissi | 48% | 278 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BergmannNo23 | 50% | 432 |
| #2 | Joe The Guide ツ | 50% | 52 |
| #3 | BigPerk | 50% | 177 |
| #4 | krissi | 48% | 278 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BergmannNo23 | 15 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | krissi | 9 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | BigPerk | 7 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Joe The Guide ツ | 3 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BergmannNo23 | 767 | 0.08 | 19 min |
| #2 | krissi | 352 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| #3 | BigPerk | 320 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #4 | Joe The Guide ツ | 100 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝗝uli𝞚n | +2.48 | 74 | 76 |
| #2 | krissi | +0.15 | 44 | 51 |
| #3 | BigPerk | -0.82 | 48 | 77 |
| #4 | BergmannNo23 | -0.98 | 40 | 64 |
| #5 | Joe The Guide ツ | -1.40 | 41 | 71 |





