








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 885 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 212 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3457 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,039 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1072 | 18% |
| Smokes | 1497 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2115 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 1355 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,614,001 of utility $261 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2287 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shirokamii | 67% | 64 |
| #2 | Francis du Bayou | 46% | 85 |
| #3 | ™Marequin Σѕl.♪★✈ ☪ | 31% | 16 |
| #4 | P i t | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shirokamii | 67% | 64 |
| #2 | Francis du Bayou | 46% | 85 |
| #3 | ™Marequin Σѕl.♪★✈ ☪ | 31% | 16 |
| #4 | P i t | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shirokamii | 7 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | Francis du Bayou | 5 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | P i t | 2 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Francis du Bayou | 216 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #2 | Shirokamii | 215 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #3 | ™Marequin Σѕl.♪★✈ ☪ | 48 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | P i t | 13 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shirokamii | +2.40 | 89 | 48 |
| #2 | aweS #10 | +0.33 | 70 | 47 |
| #3 | P i t | +0.13 | 63 | 60 |
| #4 | ™Marequin Σѕl.♪★✈ ☪ | -0.04 | 73 | 74 |
| #5 | Francis du Bayou | -1.39 | 65 | 57 |





