








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 75 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 259 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3506 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,292 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4510 | 34% |
| Smokes | 3544 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2680 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2558 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $608,016 of utility $81 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 157 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | manugsss | 63% | 19 |
| #2 | pookie | 60% | 20 |
| #3 | genius | 59% | 51 |
| #4 | gaperj | 56% | 124 |
| #5 | sml | 55% | 113 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | gaperj | 56% | 124 |
| #5 | sml | 55% | 113 |
| #6 | :) Smilejayy FREEMONEY.NET | 54% | 154 |
| #7 | g | 54% | 28 |
| #8 | Rigo_4_PT | 46% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pookie | 3 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | manugsss | 3 | 0.0099 |
| #3 | :) Smilejayy FREEMONEY.NET | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #4 | gaperj | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | sml | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sml | 444 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #2 | :) Smilejayy FREEMONEY.NET | 417 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #3 | genius | 195 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #4 | Rigo_4_PT | 181 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #5 | g | 144 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | genius | +2.09 | 79 | 56 |
| #2 | sml | +1.26 | 83 | 61 |
| #3 | kun | +0.90 | 70 | 60 |
| #4 | :) Smilejayy FREEMONEY.NET | +0.82 | 85 | 51 |
| #5 | g | -0.25 | 66 | 74 |





