








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 617 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 156 matches | ||
| Premier | 151 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 101 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 86 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




80 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4896 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,244 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4534 | 40% |
| Smokes | 3658 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1977 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1075 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $827,712 of utility $75 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1097 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | invicti | 59% | 210 |
| #2 | ian <3 | 58% | 36 |
| #3 | .noclip Grizzly | 58% | 50 |
| #4 | M1 | 57% | 28 |
| #5 | StormyLT4 | 55% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | .noclip Grizzly | 58% | 50 |
| #4 | M1 | 57% | 28 |
| #5 | StormyLT4 | 55% | 29 |
| #6 | D3 xXx navy | 51% | 43 |
| #7 | shake it for luther king | 50% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | invicti | 21 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | M1 | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | .noclip Grizzly | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | D3 xXx navy | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | invicti | 924 | 0.21 | 24 min |
| #2 | D3 xXx navy | 191 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #3 | shake it for luther king | 172 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #4 | ian <3 | 106 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #5 | StormyLT4 | 67 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | invicti | +5.33 | 87 | 60 |
| #2 | flower | +0.48 | 79 | 46 |
| #3 | ian <3 | -0.12 | 65 | 66 |
| #4 | D3 xXx navy | -0.71 | 68 | 55 |
| #5 | .noclip Grizzly | -0.94 | 50 | 49 |





