








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1127 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,093 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1077 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1077 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 786 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1153 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $384,398 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 19 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Steve French | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | Basik | 52% | 33 |
| #3 | Mekatakino ジ | 50% | 10 |
| #4 | Computer Gremlin | 45% | 31 |
| #5 | young saia | 41% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Basik | +2.46 | 63 | 61 |
| #2 | Marty | +1.71 | 67 | 44 |
| #3 | aidan | +1.46 | 70 | 34 |
| #4 | Computer Gremlin | +0.85 | 51 | 40 |
| #5 | DNBLU | +0.84 | 55 | 61 |





