








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 78 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 36 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1232 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,020 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1783 | 36% |
| Smokes | 992 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1198 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1047 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $219,109 of utility $71 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 129 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Heacker | 58% | 12 |
| #2 | ZERAF | 50% | 14 |
| #3 | tibo | 50% | 20 |
| #4 | spx /n/ | 50% | 42 |
| #5 | B0ttemB0T psykic | 47% | 90 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Z𝖊m𝖊✘ ❤ ᴳᵒᵈ 10 | 338 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #2 | B0ttemB0T psykic | 276 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | Aansteker | 269 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #4 | spx /n/ | 223 | 0.26 | 6 min |
| #5 | tibo | 80 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Heacker | +6.16 | 83 | 63 |
| #2 | Aansteker | +4.05 | 89 | 58 |
| #3 | spx /n/ | +2.49 | 75 | 77 |
| #4 | B0ttemB0T psykic | +0.41 | 64 | 77 |
| #5 | Z𝖊m𝖊✘ ❤ ᴳᵒᵈ 10 | -0.57 | 35 | 80 |





