








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1001 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,085 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 952 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1275 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 719 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1139 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $260,800 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | (◣_◢) HeonE | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | antifreeze | 70% | 20 |
| #3 | Cyn1ca | 62% | 13 |
| #4 | K-ON! | 61% | 18 |
| #5 | cLix | 60% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Maser | 56% | 9 |
| #10 | SeMy | 53% | 15 |
| #11 | Ravi | 50% | 8 |
| #12 | MAKE ALPACA GREAT AGAIN | 50% | 8 |
| #13 | baekgu花火 | 44% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cyn1ca | 3 | 0.0102 |
| #2 | cLix | 2 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | Karina | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | baekgu花火 | 1 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | (◣_◢) HeonE | 1 | 0.0067 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Karina | +4.97 | 72 | 66 |
| #2 | K-ON! | +3.91 | 88 | 56 |
| #3 | baekgu花火 | +3.00 | 98 | 43 |
| #4 | Cyn1ca | +2.99 | 84 | 58 |
| #5 | cLix | +2.04 | 88 | 60 |





