








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 170 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 105 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3605 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,181 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2108 | 23% |
| Smokes | 3232 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 690 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 3151 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $419,426 of utility $60 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 31 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | <3JOHTH WICK<3 | 65% | 20 |
| #2 | OnUh | 44% | 90 |
| #3 | Dylown | 40% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | <3JOHTH WICK<3 | 65% | 20 |
| #2 | OnUh | 44% | 90 |
| #3 | Dylown | 40% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OnUh | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Dylown | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | <3JOHTH WICK<3 | 2 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OnUh | 215 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | <3JOHTH WICK<3 | 80 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #3 | Dylown | 54 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | <3JOHTH WICK<3 | +2.18 | 77 | 83 |
| #2 | Randy | +2.00 | 81 | 52 |
| #3 | Dylown | -4.52 | 11 | 40 |
| #4 | OnUh | -4.63 | 9 | 54 |





