








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 645 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 287 matches | ||
| Faceit | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Esplay | 12 matches | 1,241 | |
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 132 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1882 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,101 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3292 | 25% |
| Smokes | 4032 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3814 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1963 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,134,855 of utility $329 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 361 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jonezki | 41% | 29 |
| #2 | kettu3 | 41% | 44 |
| #3 | [FIN]Prollution | 37% | 35 |
| #4 | Juippa | 37% | 82 |
| #5 | Esabb1 | 34% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | [FIN]Prollution | 37% | 35 |
| #4 | Juippa | 37% | 82 |
| #5 | Esabb1 | 34% | 32 |
| #6 | isimies | 25% | 24 |
| #7 | Mira | 11% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Esabb1 | 6 | 0.0093 |
| #2 | Mira | 2 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | Jonezki | 1 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | isimies | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [FIN]Prollution | 101 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | Esabb1 | 86 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | Jonezki | 72 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | Juippa | 70 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | isimies | 54 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Esabb1 | +2.73 | 49 | 68 |
| #2 | Juippa | +1.61 | 29 | 60 |
| #3 | Jonezki | +0.98 | 49 | 71 |
| #4 | kettu3 | -2.22 | 23 | 33 |
| #5 | TORPEX | -3.78 | 15 | 52 |





