










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 376 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 119 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
912 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,721 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 395 | 23% |
| Smokes | 609 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 199 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 518 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,062,239 of utility $276 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 111 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | slikka | 45% | 11 |
| #2 | alphabet soup | 43% | 30 |
| #3 | L@W | 38% | 99 |
| #4 | CritMamba | 37% | 103 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | slikka | 45% | 11 |
| #2 | alphabet soup | 43% | 30 |
| #3 | L@W | 38% | 99 |
| #4 | CritMamba | 37% | 103 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CritMamba | 7 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | L@W | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | alphabet soup | 2 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | L@W | 267 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #2 | CritMamba | 139 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | alphabet soup | 77 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | slikka | 2 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | alphabet soup | +2.90 | 55 | 61 |
| #2 | slikka | +2.83 | 64 | 10 |
| #3 | L@W | +2.31 | 53 | 53 |
| #4 | King meekz | -1.51 | 34 | 37 |
| #5 | CritMamba | -2.89 | 21 | 32 |





