










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 663 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 183 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2883 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,557 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2386 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2206 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1049 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 1916 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $890,346 of utility $176 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 211 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | grape | 58% | 12 |
| #2 | doobs | 54% | 82 |
| #3 | ♥ niise | 53% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | grape | 58% | 12 |
| #2 | doobs | 54% | 82 |
| #3 | ♥ niise | 53% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | doobs | 14 | 0.0078 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | doobs | 282 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #2 | ♥ niise | 116 | 0.38 | 4 min |
| #3 | grape | 71 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | doobs | +3.06 | 89 | 54 |
| #2 | Mellow | +1.90 | 87 | 58 |
| #3 | ♥ niise | +0.87 | 76 | 73 |
| #4 | grape | +0.14 | 81 | 59 |





