








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 46 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 422 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4401 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,658 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 955 | 11% |
| Smokes | 2390 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2692 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2621 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $434,439 of utility $41 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 78 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grzita | 57% | 56 |
| #2 | Juadaaqui | 51% | 53 |
| #3 | MrDemonS | 50% | 103 |
| #4 | dextin19 | 43% | 51 |
| #5 | Weed & Beer | 28% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grzita | 57% | 56 |
| #2 | Juadaaqui | 51% | 53 |
| #3 | MrDemonS | 50% | 103 |
| #4 | dextin19 | 43% | 51 |
| #5 | Weed & Beer | 28% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grzita | 4 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Juadaaqui | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | MrDemonS | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | Weed & Beer | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juadaaqui | 262 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| #2 | Weed & Beer | 132 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | Grzita | 105 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | MrDemonS | 73 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | dextin19 | 26 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grzita | +0.09 | 67 | 56 |
| #2 | Sticklyn | -0.10 | 56 | 35 |
| #3 | dextin19 | -0.23 | 54 | 50 |
| #4 | MrDemonS | -0.49 | 52 | 59 |
| #5 | Weed & Beer | -2.06 | 29 | 63 |





