








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 209 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4650 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,189 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5463 | 45% |
| Smokes | 2773 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3067 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 886 | 7% |
Our logs show you have wasted $911,693 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 410 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cityz3n | 79% | 19 |
| #2 | | Aieclakx ☨ | 73% | 22 |
| #3 | Ned | 64% | 33 |
| #4 | DaG | 59% | 145 |
| #5 | Neko yōguruto | 56% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Articachin | 20 | 0.0084 |
| #2 | DaG | 11 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Adibou | 9 | 0.0146 |
| #4 | Ridou | 8 | 0.0060 |
| #5 | SamTh13 El Pepito | 7 | 0.0059 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DaG | 593 | 0.21 | 17 min |
| #2 | Neko yōguruto | 80 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #3 | Ridou | 77 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Adibou | 68 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | Ned | 58 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Perceval | +10.22 | 93 | 78 |
| #2 | | Aieclakx ☨ | +3.19 | 70 | 58 |
| #3 | Cityz3n | +1.87 | 78 | 68 |
| #4 | Neko yōguruto | +1.16 | 78 | 64 |
| #5 | Ned | -0.79 | 83 | 54 |





