








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 267 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 38 matches | ||
| Faceit | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




44 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1710 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,229 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 903 | 21% |
| Smokes | 910 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1180 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1236 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $659,746 of utility $195 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 476 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ØmEgA | 72% | 25 |
| #2 | LOVER | 70% | 10 |
| #3 | F1re-vivi | 70% | 10 |
| #4 | surf_ski | 50% | 10 |
| #5 | NyToz | 46% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | NyToz | 46% | 35 |
| #6 | VIT | Penny'S Navidad | 43% | 58 |
| #7 | Bleusealord | 40% | 10 |
| #8 | arXadia | 40% | 50 |
| #9 | totoclt78 | 40% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | totoclt78 | 20 | 0.0146 |
| #2 | arXadia | 18 | 0.0171 |
| #3 | NyToz | 16 | 0.0219 |
| #4 | VIT | Penny'S Navidad | 12 | 0.0102 |
| #5 | LOVER | 4 | 0.0193 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | arXadia | 103 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #2 | ØmEgA | 86 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #3 | VIT | Penny'S Navidad | 80 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Bleusealord | 78 | 0.37 | 3 min |
| #5 | totoclt78 | 67 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | F1re-vivi | +6.51 | 77 | 44 |
| #2 | ØmEgA | +4.87 | 61 | 60 |
| #3 | ATo | +2.39 | 85 | 51 |
| #4 | LOVER | +2.17 | 58 | 61 |
| #5 | arXadia | +1.41 | 81 | 37 |





