








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1661 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1186 matches | ||
| Wingman | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 123 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




71 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
13214 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 46,552 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13302 | 29% |
| Smokes | 10128 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 13475 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 9647 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,923,816 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 940 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Floppson | 49% | 301 |
| #2 | ejjjjjaaaaaaaaaa | 48% | 479 |
| #3 | Lovros | 47% | 163 |
| #4 | ZätaToot | 42% | 127 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Floppson | 49% | 301 |
| #2 | ejjjjjaaaaaaaaaa | 48% | 479 |
| #3 | Lovros | 47% | 163 |
| #4 | ZätaToot | 42% | 127 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Floppson | 39 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | ZätaToot | 21 | 0.0083 |
| #3 | Lovros | 15 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | ejjjjjaaaaaaaaaa | 13 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Floppson | 863 | 0.14 | 21 min |
| #2 | ejjjjjaaaaaaaaaa | 528 | 0.05 | 13 min |
| #3 | Lovros | 233 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | ZätaToot | 232 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Floppson | +2.03 | 68 | 71 |
| #2 | Vaterrra | -0.23 | 54 | 65 |
| #3 | ejjjjjaaaaaaaaaa | -0.67 | 49 | 51 |
| #4 | Lovros | -1.77 | 34 | 37 |
| #5 | ZätaToot | -3.12 | 32 | 50 |





