








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 15 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
193 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 486 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 64 | 13% |
| Smokes | 143 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 149 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 130 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $59,665 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IWasAScumbag | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | skoalincole | 100% | 2 |
| #3 | Dakwii | 56% | 18 |
| #4 | voice_enable 0 | 43% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IWasAScumbag | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | skoalincole | 100% | 2 |
| #3 | Dakwii | 56% | 18 |
| #4 | voice_enable 0 | 43% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | voice_enable 0 | 2 | 0.0069 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dakwii | 17 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #2 | voice_enable 0 | 14 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #3 | skoalincole | 2 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #4 | IWasAScumbag | 2 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skoalincole | +3.21 | 68 | 29 |
| #2 | Dakwii | +3.19 | 89 | 50 |
| #3 | IWasAScumbag | +1.15 | 48 | 32 |
| #4 | voice_enable 0 | -0.43 | 60 | 42 |
| #5 | ConNoR-_- | -0.85 | 59 | 59 |





