










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Premier | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
590 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,582 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 515 | 20% |
| Smokes | 669 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 872 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 526 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $214,637 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 71 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | A$ap Danko | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | felixenjoyer_ | 75% | 4 |
| #3 | cba | 75% | 4 |
| #4 | Mefp | 53% | 19 |
| #5 | ᚠᚱᛋᛏ | 45% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DM | 90 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #2 | ᚠᚱᛋᛏ | 66 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #3 | Mefp | 57 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | A$ap Danko | 45 | 0.42 | 1 min |
| #5 | Kawazaki | 17 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | felixenjoyer_ | +8.16 | 93 | 62 |
| #2 | ᚠᚱᛋᛏ | +3.15 | 79 | 63 |
| #3 | DM | +3.00 | 68 | 76 |
| #4 | cba | +2.08 | 50 | 57 |
| #5 | Kawazaki | +0.71 | 87 | 63 |





