








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 67 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
463 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,109 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 290 | 26% |
| Smokes | 298 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 331 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 190 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $95,097 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 31 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | trplex | 67% | 6 |
| #2 | Serquest | 57% | 14 |
| #3 | SmileY- | 56% | 9 |
| #4 | chaos | 55% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | trplex | 67% | 6 |
| #2 | Serquest | 57% | 14 |
| #3 | SmileY- | 56% | 9 |
| #4 | chaos | 55% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SmileY- | 6 | 0.0335 |
| #2 | Serquest | 2 | 0.0064 |
| #3 | chaos | 2 | 0.0085 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Serquest | 56 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #2 | chaos | 41 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #3 | SmileY- | 30 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #4 | trplex | 12 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SmileY- | +4.57 | 89 | 39 |
| #2 | Noname | +2.12 | 81 | 50 |
| #3 | trplex | +0.24 | 65 | 59 |
| #4 | chaos | -1.47 | 66 | 64 |
| #5 | Serquest | -1.81 | 52 | 63 |





